I am not a DJ
I’m not a DJ. I own no decks. My music taste is too obscure to really please any kind of audience. I was slightly surprised to be asked told to DJ at a friend’s party yesterday. I’d had a few days notice* so I’d put together a playlist of things people might like, and made DVD-ROM of the mp3s. The plan was – import the files into the hostess’s laptop, then plug laptop into music centre, then control the playlist from there, maybe even sticking it on shuffle. (iTunes has an automatic volume-levelling funtion that I don’t normally like, but with such a wide variation of music styles I was thinking that it was an ok alternative to fiddling with the voulme every time a new track started)
The first thing that went wrong, was the laptop didn’t recognise the DVD, even though it had the DVD logo on it and everything. Then I plugged the laptop into the music machine, and found that even on full volume it was barely audible. This is either something wrong with the AUX in or the laptop’s audio out. Anyway, that wasn’t going to do it.
I ended up ‘DJ-ing’ by playing the music through the TV’s built-in DVD player and controling things with the remote control. Next time I am bringing a fucking PA system. I was forced to consume a bottle of Rioja, but I don’t mind that so much.
Surprise hit of the night: Girls Against Boys. I only put a couple of tracks in for reasons I can no longer remember.
Real Surprise Of The Night : ‘Mr.Haze’ by Mink15. I was almost embarrassed to have to admit that it was my own music. Almost. We haven’t even got a website yet, or anything.
No Surprise At All: Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings – the hostess is really quite keen on these – and The Smiths, even though a few people quite hated them.
I have no intention of ever Dj-ing ever again. Ever.
*I knew I had to DJ, but due to a typo in the email thought I had a month to get my shit together.
What? Why Bother? 