I Hate Xmas Cards

penguin2
A Fucking Penguin

I hate xmas cards. Perhaps ‘hate’ is too strong a word. Perhaps I just find xmas cards to be a complete waste of time, effort, organisation, postage and mastlepiece space. Because that’s what they are. I can just about understand it if autie Mabel who lives the other side of the world wants to send a card. I can’t understand it if the people you work with send a card – you see them all the time, all week – why can’t they just wish you a merry christmas to your face rather than give you a card? The environment would be better for it, the average postie would no doubt appreciate the reduction in workload, and there wouldn’t the inexplicable feeling of guilt when you realise you haven’t sent a card to Dorothy in accounts who sent you a loverly card featuring some ice-skating penguins wearing adorable hats.

On the subject of penguins on xmas card/giftwrap, etc: They are often seen cavorting with polar bears, which is a fucking joke. i) the polar bears would eat the penguins. ii) polar bears live in the arctic, penguins live only in the southern hemisphere. The only way they could possibly be in the same place if someone at the zoo has a rather sick sense of humour, or possibly has run out of polar bear food.

If I work with you, and you sent me a Christmas card – I’m not talking about your card obviously. the card you sent me was lovely.

(Penguin photo by Stan Shebs under Creative Commons Attribution ShareAlike 2.5 License)
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